So today, my thoughts and questions for God, were centred around my daughter.
She’s our one and only.
We struggled a bit to make her and we’re so grateful that she did come into our lives, as we’d reached a point where we’d (pretty much) made our peace with the prospect of a child-free future.
A little bit more back-story – just to explain my ‘helicopter parent’ type tendencies! – Kitty was labelled ‘failure to thrive’ as a baby, due to an undiagnosed milk allergy.
I came close to having – or perhaps had, I’m not sure – a break down. The stress of seeing my baby’s weight slide down and down in spite of anything I did, was an awful lot to bear.
Another thing worth mentioning is the fact that I’ve lost my mum – the most painful thing I’ve ever been through, as she was my best friend and almost part of who I was.
So, fast-forward to right now, where – well, I’m a bit of a worrier when it comes to my girl’s well-being.
This morning our neighbour invited us in to see the kittens his cat had recently given birth to.
You don’t perhaps get a sense of the scale in these photos, but these little ones were about the size of my hand: dinks-ville!
The kittens’ mum was quite naturally keeping an eye on them, but our neighbour remarked that she seemed to be getting happier with her little ones being handled.
The Rev. remarked later that perhaps it was because she was learning that the majority of humans adore kittens and wouldn’t wish them harm in a million years.
I’m not sure if you ever make your peace with events that have been traumatic for you or if you just hurt a little less each time you dare to peel back the elastoplast to check on the wound.
I guess I’m trusting that God has worked and continues to work His healing in my life.
But our morning with the cats did get me thinking about the nature of parenting: that showing parental concern is okay, but that my little kitten will probably always return to me okay too.